It is hard to pick an adequate definition of failure.
In relation to how we live our life, we fail every day.
Perfection is not an actuality. It is more like a preference.
Perfectionists strive perfection. They have certain things in order.
More is better. Having more and it being exactly as they want is the highest attainable goal.
The problem is that this is not a real goal.
It can’t be accomplished.
No matter how hard you try, there will always be that little voice inside your head saying, “No”. It needs to be better.
Even without that, there is nothing wrong with failing in life.
The people who are perfectionists that never fail are prone to act rashly when it finally happens. And it will happen eventually.
I have seen where people have actually ended their own life because of a really bad situation.
Perfection is an illusion.
As far as I am concerned, God is the only perfect thing. If you want perfection, seek that form of perfection. Give yourself some slack.
Don’t “not try”
Now it might be easy to say I won’t do perfection. I won’t even try.
This is the other extreme.
Don’t do this one either.
You need to try. Give effort. Search for meaning.
That’s what we are intended to do.
Find yourself. Get into religion. These are all good things.
And I have actually seen people that aren’t perfection try to quit being perfectionists.
9 times out of 10, they fall under this category. So, keep giving it what you got. That’s what you are here for.
Failure is inevitable
You will fail. You need to fail at something. Otherwise you will not know the pain of falling down. But if you don’t fail, you will not know the invigoration of redemption.
When you fail, you have the opportunity to get back up. Every time. How that exactly ends up, depends on you. How you respond to the moments before you.
Do not try to fail. Trust me, it will happen sooner or later. The point is to recognize it when it happens. Remember that it is not the worst thing that could happen.
I really believe that is what the movie, ‘Fight Club’ is about. Go around and pick fights with people and lose. Cool. Not really a great example for humanity. The reason though, is to say failure is an opportunity to see your life in a new light.
Embarrassment is temporary
The pain will go away. This is not bodily pain. Not injury.
It is your mind and ego taking a hit. Recognize it that way.
Chances are that you won’t know 75% of the people you know now in 20 years anyway. Why should you care what they think?
Worry about yourself. Choose a new path. Start a new direction. You might even see a better way after the fact anyway.
Resilience is permanent
Once you build yourself up a few times. After you fail. You see the forest for the trees. The big picture becomes a clearer image.
The goals you have become more concrete. Things that you liked before come back into your life.
Even the people you love become more important (even if they don’t seem to understand).
It’s a choice that you make. That is what ultimately defines that failure.
Learn from it
This expands resilience into what you now are.
The lessons from failure are like tattoos. They characterize what you have accepted as a part of you. For better or worse, they have cleansed you from a lazy and boring life. Trust in how you handled those failures. Remember how those failures challenged you.
You can use that inner strength later. Because chances are the same kind of challenges will come up.
When they do, remember you have been there before. And just keep on truckin’.