The Domino Effect

There are times when things are going good.  And then there are times that just do not seem to stop going bad..

I was constantly falling back to the same way I did things.  Whether, I would drink too much, do things that were unhealthy for me, it didn’t really make a difference.

Things would just keep getting worse.

It is like a natural phenomena.  If you don’t do things that are healthy for you, you will pay the price.  This went on for years.

And at some point, I said to myself, enough.

A few years ago, I asked my wife to marry me, and things have been put back together in my life.  Sure, those old habits loom in the background.   But they are fading out, along with the old habits that were unhealthy.

It’s a matter of perspective really.  The things that mattered to me most were not the things that were really important.

I was forced to say, what makes me want to have a purpose?  Even better, what do I want out of life?

And asking these questions made sense.

I wanted a family.  Someone who would always be there for me no matter what.

My current wife and I had been dating for almost a year.  And it was almost like everything fell into place with asking her.

A month earlier and I wouldn’t have asked.  But December 2012, I really felt that it was time to make up my mind about the whole thing.

I had gotten the ring, which my parents advised to upgrade.

The day I asked her to marry me kind of surprised me.  (I was thinking she might have said no)

It just all felt right.  The good times were rolling.

The next year though, some circumstances came up.  We had a baby, and due to my job, I would miss its being born.

But it was ok.  My wife had a great attitude about it, and the situation worked out.


That’s how things can be.  You can make a decision, and boom! it can change your life.

It could be said that the bad things in my life made me turn this new leaf.  But really it was the looking forward to being with my wife, and family that made it an easier decision.

Sure, I was tired of coming home, going to sleep, and going to work.

The need for  love on a deeper level with another individual really changed me, and was what I wanted.

Things happen in life for a reason.  People can get lucky sometimes. Relationships take work.

This is good work.  A sense of process and accomplishment have never been so tied together as when two people spend their lives together.

You have kids, issues, resolutions, and just move on.

The more this relationship grows, the more it is obvious to see.

That is a choice at the root of a beginning that dictates how the rest of my life should be.  Start with a relationship.  From there, water it like a garden, and watch it flourish.

This new years, I acknowledge the importance of that starting point.  It is the single biggest thing that has happened in my life to bring me to where I am.  And I am forever thankful that God has brought our lives together to change each other for the better.

Making a choice to live my life in a new way has given me new life every year.


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2 Responses to The Domino Effect

  1. I like how you say that you need to water a relationship like a garden, you are so correct, it needs tending, love and care to flourish. Your wife is lucky to have you – blessings!

  2. Nadine says:

    Great post for the New Year! I definitely try to keep a cup half full perspective when things get rough. Blessings on your family in the year to come!!!

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